Brangelina, please adopt me.

Reasons to adopt me:
1. I heart poor people in the developing world.
2. I already think you're the hottest, I mean, nicest Mom around.
3. I could easily share my section of the compound with other adopted children.
4. I'm low maintenance compared to the rest of your Hollywood friends.
5. I can take care of myself, especially if you gave me a $50,000 a month allowance.
6. My S.O., who is super hot, would always be around to add aesthetic value to the compound.

So consider it. Oh, and I'll babysit a couple of nights a month since I'll will be a part of the family.